Please don’t look at my cellulite!

One of the things that shocked me when I arrived to Kuwait is that I cannot stroll as I came into this world in the female changing rooms of my gym.

Being naked as a female in a female changing room is considered offensive. I was indeed very intrigued by this rule, and I wondered how this would work… If I cannot change my clothes in a changing room, where am I suppose to do it?!?

After some arduous inquiries and investigations, I discovered that there were some “micro-changing-rooms” within the female changing room, to ensure adherence to the cultural traditions.

I am very determined to respect the cultural aspects of Kuwait but this requires from me an extra effort, let me explain myself.

Every time I rush to the gym (always late) I have to do many stopovers: to my closed to leave my bags, then to the micro-changing-room, then back to my closed to leave my clothes, then rush to the stairs to go up to Pilates… By the time I reach the Pilates class I am: (1) late and (2) exhausted, and still I have to listen to my beloved teacher Amira looking at me and saying: “Lift your legs higher, tighten your abdominals...” While I look at her asking for clemency and wondering if she would ever be aware of my “changing-room-productivity-impact” syndrome…

The fact is cultural. The question is “WHY”. Will the other females be offended by seeing my cellulite (no matter my efforts -always in vain- to fight it)? Will I be transposed by the fact of seeing the luscious gluts from my female neighbor? Haven’t we women all been born the same?

Are there private changing rooms in all schools and universities in Kuwait? Do girls grow up hiding from each other in Kuwait? If not, when does the hiding process start? It is to me very, very mysterious…

For the time being, I will keep on hiding… Otherwise, I would definitely create a cultural clash.

The 5 most convenient things about Kuwait

Some of my spanish friends do not fully understand why I live in Kuwait, when I could be living in wonderful Barcelona. Far from family and friends, too hot in summer, no wine, no tapas, censorship, lack of cultural offer... "What the hell are you doing there?" they ask me over and over.

Is true that the fact of being far from home (in Kuwait or elsewhere) has many disadvantages, but in this post I would like to list some of the top conveniences of living in Kuwait, country where I fell very welcomed and happy.

[In another post I will talk about things I love about Kuwait, these are merely convenient things I don't have in Spain]

1. No taxes:

In Spain I could be paying about 30% of my income to the government. As a Spanish friend of mine used to say, I would be working from Jan to April for the government and only in May start to earn money for myself. IS NOT FUN.

2. No household to-do's:

I LOVE IT. No cleaning, no vacuuming, no ironing, no NOTHING. Siriyani, my maid, does everything for me. Still I cook, because I like it, but I do not have to clean all the mess and utensils used for the matter.

3. More flexibility:

Recently I went over all the bureaucratic procedures you can imagine for obtaining visa residence, civil ID, driving license, importing car... The process was very painful because was ever changing, specially the residence and car import processes, BUT at the same time, the government representatives would allow me for some flexibility. Specially, I have to admit, if you are a female and you know how to play it.

Ladies, if you have issues with bureaucracy, DO NOT SEND YOUR MANDOUBs (messenger), go yourselves!

A carefully calculated smile and a "help me please, me poor spaniard", would do magic...

A couple of references to Futbol Club Barcelona and a couple of spontaneous words in my rudimentary arabic, would make me obtain the necessary approvals....

4. No "sardine-box-sized" apartments

My apartment in Barcelona has 55 sq. m. It has a kitchen, living room, 2 rooms, a bathroom and balcony. My closed neighbor has only one room, instead of two, AND has a baby, which sleeps in the living room, since there is no space. ALL SAID.

In Kuwait I am leaving in 300 sq. m: 3 rooms, 2 living rooms, maid room, washing room... My parking places have the size of my living room in BCN and the maid room here in kuwait is as big as my masterbedroom in BCN... And we are talking of a 400.000 Euro apartment, no peanuts!

My mom always says that I will have to sell my clothes prior to moving back to BCN, since they wont fit in my 55sq. m sardine-box. I'm not sure whether she is joking...

5. Increased safety:

I have been robbed twice in BCN, (once with a knife!) and I have many friends and family members which also have been robbed. In Kuwait, I never had any issue and my perception so far is that it is a much safer country (at least regarding pick-pocketing, we'll talk about road safety in another post...)

New car? Please remove the plastics...

Can someone explain me why in Kuwait people keep the plastics covering the seats when buying a new car? Everytime I see one of these cars, I can't help laughing.

I have two theories: (1) they want to protect the car from spots and dirt OR (2) they want to express themselves "in-case-you-did-not-notice-I-have-a-new-car-please-do"

Option 1: Discarded. Why old cars do not seem to have any cover? In many shops you can easily buy adjustable covers which would protect from eroding the seats, BUT strangely enough very few cars have that.

Option 2: Potential explanation? I am not sure how the plate number system works here in Kuwait, but in some countries (like Spain) you can clearly see by the number plate if a car is new or old (by using a system created with consecutive numbers and letters). Maybe the Kuwaiti system does not work this way, and is the only way to SHOW OFF?

Guys, girls, please please remove the plastics! Nothings looks more cheap than a car with its plastics still on. Why aren't these people wearing their new clothes with the price and brand tags? At the end of the day, they are new as well...

Oh, boy...